Tuesday, April 7, 2009

A Photo - Counting Backwards - Thanks

I downloaded photos I took at the prison 2 weekends ago and when I went to look through them, I got to one picture and for almost 2 seconds could NOT figure out who one of the people in the shot was. Honestly, could not! Then I realized: It was me....now there were several reasons, I think, I didn't recognize myself. First, my expression was one of disgust mixed with frustration, and second, I was bending at the waist with my face swung towards the camera, not a good look....but third, my face was slimmer!  Even when I realized it was me, I had to look at it a few times to really believe it. So, I was very happy to see some weight off my bones....I guess now I need to work on transforming that look of disgust and frustration. 

As for counting backwards, here's the deal. Counting sequentially gets in my way whether that's during a workout or a run or while meditating. The whole numbers thing trips me up motivationally. So, this past Monday (when I should have been doing intervals) I decided to just run plain, even laps at the indoor track. Part of this was to calm my soul after a day that was somewhat edgy, knowing that I needed to be doing something steady and predictable and calming. "Ah, perhaps tonight I have it in me to run 2 miles without stopping," I thought to myself. But already my head was saying, "Or you could run the usual 7 laps that make up a mile - 1,2,3,4,5,6,7 - and be done with it. THEN, you can walk for another 30 minutes and sprinkle in a one-lap run here and there."  

Then, it was like another little voice in my head suddenly was born, my own little instructional burning bush. "Count backwards from 14," it said. "Fourteen counting down to 1 and you'll have 2 miles done, no problem."  Now exactly why it works  for me to count down from the 2 mile lap amount versus counting up to it, I can't say... and I'm too tired to ponder it much tonight.  But, changing my own routine or rules or perspective or whatever we want to call it worked. I ran 2 miles without stopping and without any real physical rebellion. (My own hand is patting my back right now.) 

Now just sitting here, nothing coming to mind to share...so, I'll sign off. Looking forward to seeing everyone on Saturday. You are all such a large part of why this program worked for me...from blogs to working out together to meetings on Saturday. This feeling of community and acceptance and of having such a safe environment to express ourselves within has really blown me away. Thank you to everyone for fostering that. 

2 comments:

  1. Brava!! for the running without dreading the numbers. And I can't imagine your happy face with a look of disgust and frustration, so it must have been a temporary blip. Rock on.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Great post, Sherri! I've been counting odds and evens beacause the regular count trips me up, but I REALLY like your idea! Much better than running in the cold - we will do that outside run without the snowflakes!
    Take care!

    ReplyDelete